Did Hitler Have Only One Testicle?
Among conspiracy buffs, this is what is known as (ahem) the lone-nut theory. But let's get serious. The case of Hitler's missing testicle is one of many bizarre twists in the life of one of history's most bizarre hombres. (Another is the never-proven allegation that Hitler's paternal grandfather was Jewish).
Hitler was really called Schicklgruber
Would Germans have been prepared to greet each other with a hearty ‘Heil Schicklgruber’ every day? Could Hitler have become a dictator if he had used his real name, Schicklgruber, or would this have been just too ridiculous aname for a dictator? These are the kind of questions that continue to be discussed regularly on Internet discussion sites. They are, however, historically pointless questions, as Schicklgruber never was Hitler’s name. Hitler’s father had been born out of the wedlock to Maria Anna Schicklgruber. Yet he had changed his name to Hitler, the name of his step-father, who by all likelihood also was his biological father, well before Adolf Hitler was born. While the claim that Adolf Hitler was really called Adolf Schicklgruber is historical nonsense, it is nevertheless telling that people continue to spread the claim. It points to the urge of people to turn Hitler into an object of ridicule.
Hitler had a Jewish grandfather
A bit of doggerel goes something like the following, originally sung by British Tommies during World War II to the tune of the "Colonel Bogey March":
Hitler has only got one ball,
Göring has two, but very small;
Himmler is very sim'lar,
And Göbbels has no balls at all.
"Hitler Has Only Got One Ball” is a British song that mocks Nazi leaders by referring to their lack of testicles. Multiple variants of the lyrics exist, generally sung as four-line verses to the tune of the “Colonel Bogey March”. The numerous versions, often obscene, reflect the enthusiasm with which it was first adopted as a British Army marching-song, then as a popular song of defiance against Adolf Hitler’s Nazi-German regime in the other branches of the British armed forces, and amongst British civilians, from 1940 onwards.
"As a means of ridiculing the Nazis, “Hitler Has Only Got One Ball” became immensely popular among Allied troops, who in transmitting this song were exercising something of a wartime convention by demeaning the sexual faculties of enemy leaders. But the mockery extended beyond just the Nazis’ sexual capacities. Since the 1920s, the words balls or ballsy had come to denote notions of courage, nerve, or fortitude. In that sense, defective testicles rendered the Nazis defective soldiers. This song’s itemized taxonomy of malformed German genitalia—the monorchid, the micro-orchid, the anorchid—was particularly forceful, and satisfying, to Allied soldiers in that it scattered satiric buckshot across the whole Nazi high command (Hitler; Hermann Göring, commander in chief of the Luftwaffe; Heinrich Himmler, Reichsführer of the SS; and Göbbels, Reich Minister of Propaganda)".
It has been stated that Hitler's autopsy revealed that he was indeed monorchic, but the confirmation comes from Soviet sources who may have had propaganda reasons for the assertion. When mentioned, the song asserts that Hitler lacked the right testicle, but the autopsy states that it was the left testicle that was missing.
In his autobiography "Fringe Benefits", well-connected Anglo-Irish gadabout and publicist Donough O’Brien says that the original was written as propaganda in August 1939 by his father, Toby O’Brien, a publicist for the British Council at the time. This version started with the words “Göring has only got one ball”, and went on to imply that Hitler had two small ones. In virtually all later versions, the positions are reversed. The statement that Himmler was “sim’lar” appears in all versions. The final line of this original and some later forms ends with the word play that Göebbels had “no balls”. Both these variations argue strongly in favour of O’Brien’s version being a very early version, and a "Daily Mail" report of the time states that it was “attributed to someone not unconnected with our old friend the British Council”.
O’Brien’s claims have not been substantiated, and no author has ever been identified for the more popular versions that begin “Hitler has only got one ball”. The song has frequently been heard and seen. The lyrics were not used in "The Bridge on the River Kwai" (1957) because they were considered too vulgar. Bette Midler sang them in her concert film "Divine Madness" and they were also heard on the British TV sitcom 'Allo 'Allo. There is no known attempt by anyone to claim or enforce a copyright on the lyrics..
It has been suggested that the pre-Glasnost Soviet descriptions of what remained of Hitler’s corpse reported his monorchism (having only one functional testicle) at the suggestion of Guy Burgess and/or Kim Philby, as part of their making a joke, based on this song, that they could expect the British population and secret services, if not those of the USA or USSR, would get.
Whatever the reason for Hitler’s alleged monorchism becoming a popular myth, there was psychodynamic literature, produced outside the USSR after WWII, which sought to explain his personality and behaviour, as a charismatic, genocidal megalomaniac, which drew on his alleged congenital “semi-castration” and/or the child-rearing practices of his family.
Göring has only got one ball
Popular alterations to the lines in this version, most of them apparently for the purpose of better fitting the “Colonel Bogey” rhythm, are similar to those discussed below and include:
Variant 1 (most common)
Hitler has only got one ball,
Hitler: he had but one left ball,
Hitler has only got one ball,
In 2002, controversial artist Takashi Murakami made a commissioned sculpture of Hitler’s testicle for an unnamed bidder for an alleged $14.7 million. The testicle was rumored to have a diameter of 10 feet and was made of cast iron. Art critic Brian Sewell called the work “feeble”.
It's customary, of course, for soldiers to impugn the sexual capacities of enemy leaders. (Another verse from the era goes, "Whistle while you work/Hitler was a jerk/Mussolini bit his weenie/Now it doesn't work".) But the troops may have had some reason to believe Hitler really was playing with a short set, so to speak. As a soldier in the German army during World War I, the future dictator was wounded in the Battle of the Somme in October, 1916. Sources differ on the precise location of the wound, but some say it was in the thigh or the groin. Conceivably some anonymous poet in the British Army heard this and used it as the basis for the above mentioned ode, although at this late date it's hard to say for sure.
[Incidentally, similar claims have been made about Hermann Göring (he supposedly lost one of his jollies during the Beer Hall Putsch) and Spanish dictator Francisco Franco. So far, the reputation of Stalin's testicles appears to be intact].
Spain's Franco 'had one testicle'
Much like the Nazi leader, Franco's loss stemmed from an injury he suffered in battle, his doctor's granddaughter told the historian Jose Maria Zavala.
Franco was wounded in the lower abdomen at El Biutz, near Ceuta, in June 1916.
Biographers have long speculated this affected the reproductive organs of the dictator, who ruled from 1939 to 1975.
However, he did have a daughter, Carmen Franco y Polo, in 1926.
Last year, documents came to light containing an account by a medic who treated Hitler during the Battle of the Somme in 1916.
Dr Johan Jambor told his priest that Hitler had been injured in the abdomen and had lost a testicle. He said the first question Hitler had asked him was: "Will I be able to have children?"
In his new book, Mr Zavala quotes Dr Ana Puigvert as recalling that her grandfather, Antonio Puigvert, a urologist known to have had Franco as a patient, had told her the dictator had confided in him.
"Franco was monorchid - he had only one testicle," she said.
Franco was a captain in the Spanish army when, in late June 1916, he was shot in the lower abdomen while defending the modern-day Spanish enclave of Ceuta on Morocco's Mediterranean coast.
In 1936, he joined the military uprising that led to the Spanish Civil War and assumed leadership of the fascist Falange Party.
Three years later, with the aid of Nazi Germany and fascist Italy, he won the war and established a dictatorship. Franco kept Spain neutral during World War II, after which he declared Spain a monarchy with himself as regent.
In 1969, he announced that on his death he would be succeeded by Juan Carlos I, grandson of Spain's last reigning king, hoping that he would maintain his regime.
However, after his death in 1975, the new king moved to dismantle the authoritarian institutions and restore democratic rule.
At this point we have to delve into the mystery surrounding Hitler's demise. On 1 May 1945, German radio announced that Hitler had been killed fighting at the head of his troops. But the Russians captured the Führer's Bunker, and nobody in the West ever saw the body. Rumors swirled that Hitler had escaped. To resolve the issue, the British assigned H.R. Trevor-Roper, later a well-known British historian, to investigate. After interrogating witnesses, Trevor-Roper concluded that Hitler and his girlfriend Eva Braun had shot themselves on 30 April, and that the bodies were cremated shortly afterward.
The Russians, however, maintained that Hitler had managed to escape. At the Potsdam conference in July, Stalin said he believed Hitler was in Spain or Argentina. This was the official line until 1950, when the Soviets unveiled a film called "The Fall of Berlin" that depicted Hitler and Braun snuffing themselves with poison. But they did not say how they arrived at this conclusion.
In 1955 the Russians released several German prisoners who had been present during Hitler's last days, one of whom told of burying Hitler's remains in a bomb crater. Trevor-Roper interviewed the men, and on the basis of their comments deduced that the Russians had exhumed the bodies and examined them in May, 1945. This was confirmed to his satisfaction in the 1960s, when Russian journalists published accounts of the search for Hitler.
One such book published in 1968 was particularly interesting, and it's here we get back to the question of Hitler's missing organs. The book included the report of the autopsy performed on Hitler's body by Russian pathologists. This contained the startling news that Hitler's "left testicle could not be found either in the scrotum or on the spermatic cord inside the inguinal canal, or in the small pelvis. . . ."
This revelation struck many as suspicious. None of Hitler's doctors or attendants had ever mentioned anything about a missing testicle, and his medical records were silent on the subject. A woman who claimed to have been his lover said he was normally equipped. Moreover, the autopsy report said Hitler's body showed no external wounds, even though all the German witnesses mentioned a shot through the head.
Hitler's World War I company commander, however, offered some support for the Russian finding. He said he'd discovered Hitler's missing testicle as a result of a wartime VD exam.
Questions about the authenticity of the Russian autopsy records were more or less resolved in 1972. Dr. Reidar Sognnaes, a dental expert at the University of California at Los Angeles, compared the Russky data with previous X-rays of Hitler's skull and pronounced the former genuine. (Sognnaes used similar methods to confirm that a body dug up in Berlin was that of Hitler's secretary, Martin Bormann.) So I guess we have to conclude that in some departments, at least, Hitler really wasn't all there.
As you can imagine, historians with a weakness for Freudian woolgathering have had a field day with this news. Perhaps the most elaborate treatment was "The Psychopathic God" by Robert G.L. Waite. Waite believed Hitler's left testicle either failed to descend at puberty or was missing at birth. He regarded the deficiency as one of the formative experiences of Hitler's life, and said it contributed to all manner of psychosexual complications. He stopped short, however, of saying it caused World War II
Why did the Russians wait so long to reveal the autopsy results? Trevor-Roper thinks Stalin arbitrarily decided that Hitler had escaped and compelled everybody else to go along. Later, he thinks, the Russians decided to keep things murky lest the Führer's death and/or remains somehow inspire future generations of Nazis. They may have suppressed evidence about the bullet wounds in order to make Hitler's demise seem less heroic.
Others, of course, have their own ideas. They see the missing testicle as evidence that the man who died in 1945 was a double. They think the Russians faked the dental evidence for unknown reasons and that Maria Schickelgruber's grandson ended up leading a life of ease in some South American banana republic.
You never know. After all, Trevor-Roper, the staunchest proponent of the Hitler-is-dead theory, was the same guy who pronounced the so-called Hitler diaries authentic.
- Cecil Adams
The Straight Dope
20 February 1987
Adolf Hitler's possible monorchism (the condition of only having one testicle) has been a fringe subject among historians and academics researching the German leader. The rumour is considered either a plausible fact or an urban myth. The British military song "Hitler Has Only Got One Ball" may have been the origin of the story. Nevertheless research, eyewitness testimony and historical study have not been able to prove or disprove the rumor.
There are actually two rumours about Hitler’s genitals – that he had a deformed penis, and (a speculation beloved of a generation of British infantrymen) that he was monorchic - ie that he had only one testicle
The one-ball rumour was current during the war, but it started as a joke. As early as 1939, British troops took to singing insulting songs about Hitler and his cronies, the most popular of which (sung to the tune of "The Colonel Bogey March") usually went:
Hitler, he only has one ball,
Göring has two but very small.
Himmler has something similar,
But poor old Göbbels has no balls at all.
An alternative version had slightly different lyrics, viz.
Hitler has only got one ball
the other is in the Albert Hall
the silly bugger
Cut it off when he was very small.
It was only long after the war that the idea that Hitler really might have been monorchic gained some currency. In the 1960s, the USSR released what was claimed to be a secret report on an autopsy Soviet pathologists had carried out on two badly burned bodies (presumed to be those of Hitler and his mistress Eva Braun) which they had found outside the Führerbunker in Berlin.
The report was republished in "The Death of Adolf Hitler: Unknown Documents from Soviet Archives", by Lev Bezymenski. However it is strongly suspected that the report was a hoax designed to discredit Hitler. It certainly contradicts the testimony of German witnesses to the dictator’s last hours in important ways. For example, it is generally accepted that while Braun committed suicide by taking cyanide, Hitler shot himself in the head (a much more soldierly thing to do). However the Soviet doctors wrote that both the people they autopsied had died after they had bitten into cyanide capsules and that glass fragments had been found in the mouths of both corpses. (The male body had also been shot in the head - by someone else, presumably - after he had taken the poison. The implication was that Hitler was too cowardly to shoot himself, and had an orderly put a bullet in his head to make himself look good to posterity once he had taken the coward’s way out). The report presented in Bezymenksi's book then goes on to state that the burned body had been identified as Hitler's in part because it had only one testicle.
Quite how Russian doctors were so certain Hitler exhibited this abnormality was not explained.
The truth is that almost no-one who survived the war could say for certain what Hitler’s genitals looked like. The dictator was pathologically reluctant to let even his own personal doctors examine him intimately – in fact this reluctance is the main reason many people suspect he must have had some sort of deformity.
According to David Irving, the controversial right-wing historian and author of "The Secret Diaries of Hitler’s Doctor", Hitler’s principal doctor, Theodor Morrell, conducted many examinations of the rest of the Nazi warlord’s body (reporting he had no hair on his chest or back, had poor teeth and was bothered by a furred tongue), but was never allowed to go ‘further south’. On one occasion, when Hitler was asked to consent to an enema to relieve the symptoms of hepatitis, the Führer refused to let his doctor slip a tube up his 'arse', and retired to a locked toilet to try to administer it himself.
If Hitler did have some sort of deformity, though, it may not have made him incapable of getting it up. Most Nazis in Hitler’s inner circle believed he did have sex with Eva Braun, though only very occasionally (the couple generally slept in separate beds). However, another Nazi doctor, Professor Doktor Hans Karl von Hasselbach, testified in 1951:
"Hitler had an extreme disinclination to let people see his body. Even I never saw him completely unclothed, let alone checked him over in that state".
Hasselbach went on to confirm that even members of the Nazi hierarchy suspected their Führer’s motives for this excessive modesty, but all he could offer was: "Probably his former manservant Emil Maurice could give some information as to whether his sex organs were deformed; he dropped hints when we were in captivity".
Unfortunately, so far as we know, Maurice – who doubled as a hired thug and occasional hitman for the Führer – never did testify on this fascinating subject.
Discovered in a Russian text by intelligence officer Lev Bezymensky, the Russians captured a German guard who had witnessed the bodies of Hitler and Braun being taken from the Bunker to the garden, where they were burned and buried.
SMERSH apparently did not believe that the two bodies they dug up along with Göbbels and his wife were Adolf and Eva, but they didn't find their bodies anywhere else in the Bunker. They examined the bodies in detail.
The autopsy report: "The teeth tell all. The autopsy report of the two bodies buried in the garden said that both had died after they had bitten into cyanide capsules: Glass fragments had been found in the mouths of both corpses. The male body had also been shot in the head - after he had taken the poison. And, like Hitler, the man had only one testicle".
This last remark is of course the one that needs further citation, but the authors treat it as a given and do not elaborate upon it. This is unusual on the authors' part, to assume certain knowledge to be true, and it stuck out like a sore thumb from just about everything else they examined.
The copy of the autopsy report presented in Bezymenksi's book states that the burned body identified as Hitler's had one testicle. Later, he notes that this had not been mentioned in the literature, and that one of Hitler's doctors commented that the Führer refused to have medical check-ups (which Bezymenski guesses may have been due to Hitler's abnormality).
During the first weeks of the year 2000, a Russian news broadcast sparked fresh interest in Adolf Hitler's Bunker suicide. The broadcast, following reports by former Soviet intelligence agents who claim to have buried the remains of Hitler and his wife Eva Braun in Magdeburg, Germany, said that much evidence was officially ignored at the time, and that the buried remains may not be of the German leader after all.
The autopsy report said that the male body had only one testicle. Aides reportedly had doused the corpse with gasoline and burned it to prevent the body from falling into Soviet hands. Its disappearance prompted reports that Hitler may have escaped.
The fact that over half a century has passed without an authorized inquiry or official explanation as to why the male body had only one testicle finally persuaded Russian investigators of a post-war cover-up. The broadcast suggested that the burnt remains may not be of the Nazi dictator.
Hitler was secret crystal meth addict – but he DID have two balls, claims new documentary
[AP] Adolf HitlerAdolf Hitler was a secret crystal meth user.
A 47-page wartime dossier compiled by American intelligence officials reveals the Führer took an incredible 74 different medications including crystal methamphetamine.
Hitler is believed to have taken the powerful drug before a meeting with Italian fascist Benito Mussolini in the summer of 1943 when he ranted for two hours straight.
The notorious hypochondriac also had nine injections of methamphetamine during his final days in his Berlin bunker.
The American records, which feature in a Channel 4 documentary called "Hitler’s Hidden Drug Habit", contain the amazing revelation, but dispel the enduring myth that the dictator only had one testicle.
The line “Hitler has only got one ball – the other is in the Albert Hall” was a morale-booster during the Second World War.
So popular is this claim that many still believe Hitler was monorchid – the medical term for being born with one testicle.
But the records reject this idea, while also dismissing claims that Hitler was a predatory homosexual who killed 150 supporters to hide his sexuality.
An entry in an American Military Intelligence Report from November 1945 based on medical records said: “He was neither a pervert nor a homosexual. His sexual organs showed no indication of abnormality”.
The papers partly draw on interviews with Hitler’s physician Dr Theodor Morell, who prescribed him with a range of pills including one called Pervitin containing crystal meth.
Dr Morell also gave Hitler Brom-Nervacit, a barbiturate, Eukodal, which contained morphine, and bulls’ semen, to give him a testosterone boost.
Methamphetamine makes users feel very alert and energised, but can also make them agitated, paranoid and aggressive.
Bill Panagopoulos, an American collector who discovered the dossier, said:
"He should not have been practising medicine anywhere outside a veterinary clinic".
"I’d be interested to know what the combination of these medications would do to someone who’s otherwise in good health".
Historian rejects claim Adolf Hitler had a micropenis